A.A. Laporte Payne letter 14 January 1917
January 14th 1917
How the time goes and nothing to shew for it except piles of papers. There has been plenty going on to keep one busy but I am afraid my thoughts and my interest are elsewhere – with a girl who has been ‘silly’ enough to thinks she is in love with me. Don’t you think she is very silly, but I love her all the more – if that is possible –for being silly in that way. Heaven only knows why she did it for I am sure I never made love to her – simply because I thought it an impossibility and there was no reason why I should not love her without her knowing it – and apparently she did not – until I was weak enough to tell her so. Don’t you think it was very weak of me? But then you see I had spent a delightful week, seeing her every day and on the last night when I had to come back to this and its many possibilities she looked so infinitely adorable and kissable and not being other than human I – well you know the rest. She really was a witch that night. What do you think were my thoughts on that taxi ride home from town that evening? I am afraid it was then that I made up my mind – wasn’t I wicked? Given the least chance I determined then. She lay back in the taxi with her hat on the floor and her hair delightfully ruffled, looking flushed and disconcerted I thought. I wonder if she were. It was a good thing for her that she had a chaperone then.
I wonder if she remembers the morning she went to Waterloo and was left alone in the house with me by her ‘unwise’ mother (bless her) and how reluctant I was to leave. I was very near misbehaving myself then; but you see it was daylight – and after all one’s first kiss should be in the evening; preferably in a cosy room by a fire after dinner,but a beggar can’t be a choser. There were many other occasions – some perhaps she can’t remember but others no doubt she can – among them the halfpenny incident. I often wonder what would have happened if there had been no war. Would she have been the same?
I am so sorry that you have had the hump lately. I do hope you are better. Do you often get that complaint? I hope not. I suffer very badly.
So my note smelt of scent. I certainly do not use any unless the beastly barber puts some on me – but that is only in England. It did not leave here smelling of anything except perhaps tobacco. I can only put it down to your lady postman. Was it very strong and cheap? I rather like a faint suspicion as long as it is good.
Are you keeping alright dear? No colds I hope. The weather is truly awful.
With my best love and a long long kiss