Hoddom Castle

Sunday 5 Sept 43

My dearest Maz,

Rather a disappointing week-end and has come to a close by my not being able to get through and have one of those chats which I look forward to so much with you on the phone, for some reason or other there was a long delay to London and beyond and – as it meant a very late call I decided to cancel same and I will try and get through one evening this week.  It’s now past 10 and I decided not to write until I had got through, so now I will get cracking!

So very many thanks for your long and interesting letter which arrived on Tuesday and was very interested to hear of your visit to Margaret, and your other news.  I was so very sorry last Sunday to have sounded so indistinct the line was playing some very queer tricks and I hope next time it will be better.  Nothing very exciting has happened this week though I’ve been very busy, especially from Thursday when Robin went off on a course for 4 or 5 days and left me in charge – since then besides doing acting BC.  I’ve had all my own work to do, have had to entertain a Canadian Major who is attached to us for a week and have also had to take over PMC of the mess, a real sickening job which involves running the mess, the accounts etc – so you can guess that I’ve been in a bit of a whirl these last few days – however Robin returns on Wednesday, the Canadian departs on Thursday, and my ‘stooge’ who will run the mess accounts etc returns to duty, from a course, on Thursday, so the end of next week should show a decrease in the mental strain of trying to do about 4 jobs at once!

One thing occupies my thoughts a bit at the moment, namely leave.  I received a letter today marked Immediate asking for a return to be submitted by next Wednesday to show stations etc to which personnel will be travelling and saying that block leave for the whole Regiment could commence on the 14^th October, this of course is subject to alteration but if that is the date when we have to go it might be worse I suppose.  As Eileen told you we rather thought of having 3 or 4 days at Bournemouth and if we went from the 15^th – 19^th our homecomings would co-incide and the last 5 or 6 days of our leave could be spent together and uninterrupted – I only hope and pray that they stick to the date given or make it later or a fortnight earlier, the curse with the block leave system being that one has to go with the rest of the Regiment – I look forward enormously to some times with you again.  This time I will not disgrace myself! and to seeing you again, our evenings and our times together are a quite indispensible part of my leave.

In many ways it doesn’t seem like a year since that wizard visit of your to Dunkeld, so much seems to have happened since then – at any place other than Hoddom Castle it would have been possible for you to have come up and had a week’s holiday and how much I should have loved it – you have been more than a hero to have run to No 5 virtually on your own without a break for so long and I know how much you must be looking forward to your Torquay trip.

One thing of interest has occurred this week that I nearly forgot to mention namely that the BC of 17 Bty has got the sack and leaves on Wednesday and I naturally await the appointment of his successor with great interest – if one of those juniors to me gets the job I shall naturally be disappointed – it may be that I might get the job but from what Robin told me before I rather hae me doots – he told me that the CO for many months has been quite determined that the next majority goes to the adjutant or one of the Troop Commanders, John Appelby, who has been in the Regiment for some 3 years or so.  If either of them does get the job my first re-action would be to have an interview with the CO and tell him that I thought it was unfair that my prospects of ever getting on in this Regiment were obviously nil and applying to be transferred elsewhere – on the other hand one is in danger of losing one’s rank especially if the CO chose to be unpleasant about it and one might, difficult though it would be, be in a worse state than the first.  I wrote a long letter to Ian a day or two back and await his reply anxiously – he may be able to help me – one can hope for the best for some time but after a bit it becomes slightly tedious!

Your advice on the subject would be very gratefully received.  This is not a happy Regiment and when even the Padre says it is ‘the unhappiest Regiment I have ever been in and all caused by one man’ then one gets a good idea of what it’s like.  I have many excellent friends among the Captains and I can honestly say, without exception, that I get on well with all of them, but above that one is treated in the mess or out of it as just a Captain and not as an individual at all.  Maz dear I can’t think what you will be thinking of all this apparently gloomy talk about something which hasn’t even *** yet though I feel it probably will.

Yesterday afternoon feeling in need of a break Stan and I decided a trip to Powfoot was the order of the day but when we got there, or rather when I got there,  Stan was kept in the office and said he would be over for tea, it poured with rain, Stan never turned up, so the afternoon was slightly wasted.  Today being bright and sunny we set off just after lunch but found a 100 m.p.h. gale blowing when we got there so we chucked it after 8 or 9 holes and had a good tea and a few ‘ciggiwegs’ ! and an extremely pleasant chat before returning.  So ended, as I say, a rather disappointing weekend.

I seem to be rambling on and on and must now close.  God bless and take care of yourself – longing to see you again, my love to Pari and tell him we will fairly knock spots of Mike Lucking and partner, and to the Elli.

            Yours ever very affectionately

                        Peter

In envelope addressed to Mrs Gerald C Benham, 5 Oxford Road Colchester Essex.

Postmarked LOCKERBIE DUMFRIESHIRE dated 6  SP 43.  (10)